Three Months We Didn't Know We Had...

Month One- 

Uncertainty, overjoyed, unbalanced, blessed, strengthened, hope, fear, immeasurable love, inspired.

These are all the emotions that I went through during Thomas's first month of life outside the womb. That little boy amazed everyone. He was born with a broken body with barely a heart beat, but was able to overcome and persevere through so much pain and other health issues. We could only look on and try our best to comfort him when we were at the hospital and to make sure he knew how much we loved him. 

I hated feeling like I wasn't able to be with Thomas as much as I wanted OR with Taylor as much as I wanted. I don't know how parents do it without family or friends to help them. How would a single mother do it? I feel like I barely survived. On top of that I was pumping breast milk every three hours while Shane worked all day long and then went straight to the hospital afterward and didn't come home until Tay was in bed. 

Month Two- 

Excitement, scrambled, tired, self doubt, frustrated, blessed, strengthened, hope, fear, immeasurable love, inspired.

Oh goodness, Thomas was actually discharged to come home! We were able to spend a full week at home before he had his first trip of many to the ER. This became the month of surprises. Every week there was something different we were worried about- feeding, re-flux, aspiration, hernia, breathing, But this was also a great month of learning and growth for all of us. Thomas was doing well with Occupational Therapy and Physical Therapy. Thomas was starting to move more and didn't seem in pain from healed fractures. Shane, his parents, and myself were learning more about Thomas and his cues. We were learning more about what was normal for Thomas and what was concerning. We researched more about respiratory and digestive issues with babies that have severe OI. We became more comfortable with the machines and with handling Thomas. I became associated with the OI Parents group and immediately felt them encircle me with their strength and experience.

One particular night, I know Shane and I felt so tired and were having a hard time handling Thomas's schedule and cries throughout the night. Everytime I heard Thomas start to cry that night, I'd say a prayer to Heavenly Father that if it wasn't serious that Thomas would be okay and go back to sleep. Thomas ended up having such a good night that night...

It seemed that there were a lot of questions I still had about the plans for Thomas and why things didn't seem constant for Thomas. Why were we going up to the ER so often? Why can't I get things figured out for my son so we can stay out of the hospital for at least two weeks? What was I doing wrong?

However, my family was together all under one roof. I was able to wake up and cuddle Thomas while Shane and Taylor chased each other around the house.

Month Three- 

Nervous, confidence, tired, frustrated, blessed, strengthened, hope, fear, immeasurable love, inspired. 

I was about to return to school. I had a couple of weeks left. Time to start making freezer meals. Time to look at lesson plans. Do I even remember all of my students' names? How am I going to balance teaching, Taylor, and Thomas? 

Thomas was still having pulmonary and digestive issues, but we were getting sick of staying trapped in the house. We grew confidence in Thomas and in ourselves and ventured to a family party, sacrament meeting, and to the park. I started looking at our situation differently. No matter how much time we have, I don't want to say that we spent all of it on one floor of our house because we were too scared to live life. I needed to figure out how to live life with Thomas's machines and his fragile body. 

Great Grandma B got to hold her first great grandson! This woman inspires me. I was exhausted from being at the ER all night so my grandma came and made me lunch and cleaned the house. She is in her 80s and is still willing to get her hands dirty and serve. I have always been able to count on her and hope she knows that I will be there to clean her house and make her lunch when it's my turn to take care of her. 

Looking ahead at the next couple months and looking back at the last few months, I realized that there was no predictability to Thomas's situation. Not only was his mutation completely unique to him, Thomas's story was unique as well. Thomas has never gone more than a week and a half without an ER visit, a sudden need for a primary care visit, or a hospital admission. So given that pretty busy history, it didn't seem doable or even smart to continue working. It seemed like it would only end up hurting my family. I had been praying as to how I can better help Thomas and without a doubt this was an answer. My family needed all of me.  

Luckily, we were able to find a replacement at the end of my first week back. Thomas made it the entire week and then needed to be taken by ambulance to Primary's. 

Month Four- 

Angry, tired, frustrated, unbalanced, relieved, blessed, strengthened, hope, fear, immeasurable love, inspired. 

Thomas celebrated his one month, two month, and three month birthdays in the hospital. Maybe his four month birthday will be different. 

During this hospital admission I have often found myself angry that Thomas isn't being handled with enough care in regards to his limbs and possibility of fractures, angry that not enough was being done to ensure that a definitive plan was in place to make sure that he didn't end up in the ambulance again, angry that I was not being listened to when speaking about experiences of other babies with severe OI. 

At the same time, I was also sinking myself into conference talks from the last session and praying daily independently and with my children. In the car to and from the hospital I was finding comfort in Primary songs and conversations with Taylor about the Plan of Salvation. 

Tired and trying to figure out how am I going to do this. It's only been a week and half but this is not a quick fix. Thomas needs a lot of help for a long time. What decisions are we going to have to make? Will today's doctor be doom and gloom or optimistic? Will today's doctor be familiar with OI? Blah..... I'm exhausted even thinking about it. But Shane and I know where we stand and know that we do not want to be the ones to tell Thomas when he is done living on this earth. We trust in Heavenly Father and we trust in Thomas. We want to give Thomas EVERY OPPORTUNITY to live his life on this earth and when and if Thomas decides it is more than his precious body can handle, his body will let us know. I will not fail Thomas. 

We were blessed to watch the play based on a book by Nathan Glad (one of our dear friends with OI)- "Climbing With Tigers". This kiddo has been such a motivator for us to fight for Thomas. He is the happiest kid and doesn't let OI get in his way from living life. The play helps others to see what life is like through his eyes. Nathan's play also teaches so much about bravery and friendship. We walked away truly lifted and grateful that Taylor was able to experience that.  GO SEE IT!!! We are so grateful to know his family and look forward to learning how to pay it forward and serve other families. 

http://www.saltlakeactingcompany.org/this-season/item/1003-climbing-with-tigers

Continuing to pray for guidance on how to take care of Thomas, consulting with my army of OI mamas, and relying on friends and family to help us as we scramble day to day... finally a care conference was set. With Thomas's entire team, we were going to finally build a plan for my little guy to not only get him to a barely safe place to go home but to get him to a strong and sturdy place that would be the most promising for Thomas in the long run. We know Thomas needs to get his lungs to mature, the proper nutrition, and the best possible way for us to support his lungs. The days leading up to the conference my prayers had changed. Instead of praying for guidance for myself, I prayed for the doctors and Thomas's team to be guided. 

The day before the conference a new attending was assigned who also happened to have a child with special needs and knew the importance of a support group and the value that other parents were able to share with me. She recognized the weaknesses of his current care plan and immediately wanted it to be more driven and goal oriented. She also reached out to other resources that specialize in OI. Between her, our primary care doctor, and the OI specialists I felt that a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. The care conference was a team of 10 who's primary concern was helping Thomas get the care he needed so he can not only come home but have the best chance of staying home for awhile. 

He's needing to have better pulmonary support via High Flow and BiPap (or Cpap... they are going to do some studies with Thomas to decide which). He's now receiving Zole treatments to help his bones and will be starting some respiratory medicine as well. I don't know how our new plan will turn out but I do know that I finally feel peace that Thomas IS in the right hands now and the doctors are going to do the best they can. 

Dreams

Tonight when I was getting ready to put Taylor to bed, she pulled out several books that we have read a million times. Finally, I stepped in to see if there was something on her shelves that we hadn't read in a while. I found a book of hers that I had actually never read with her- "Fanny's Dream". 

I read about this woman who was waiting for her fairy godmother who never came. She never got to marry the prince or live in a castle or live a life free from hard work. But she did marry a man who loved her. They worked side by side. She had her hands full with taking care of the children and the life they had created for themselves. Their house burned down, but they rebuilt it and pushed forward. Later, her fairy godmother finally came and offered her the dreams she had long ago. She chose the life she had built. 

Holding back tears as I finished reading this book to Taylor, I realized that I would not have my life any other way. Yes, of course I wish I could take away Thomas's struggles, the medical bills, the stress, splitting our time between our children, and how tired we are.....

But I LOVE my husband and how hard he works for us and how much he loves being a dad. His patience and his priesthood has been such a blessing during this time. I LOVE what a strong spirited girl my daughter is, how caring she is to her brother, her creativity and her affectionate personality. I LOVE my son's facial expressions, quiet strength, his smiles and coos, his heavenly spirit, and the humility and perspective he has given me. 

What has happened to Thomas is not any mother's dream, but I know that we can build an even more wonderful life for our family because Thomas is a part of it. 

New Year, New Room!

Oh my goodness, this last week has been a crazy week. We loved spending time with Shane's family for New Years. Taylor enjoys playing and being crazy with her older cousins.

We received a call that Thomas was pooping out blood and that they were going to do tests to see what was going on. Everything came back normal AND it didn't happen any other times so they're not worried about it anymore. When they called to tell me this they also called to tell me that Thomas was going to be released in the next week. WHAT?!!!

He's done so well since the week of Christmas on his breathing that he's finally down to no pressure, and only the lowest setting possible of oxygen. Thomas is also gaining weight and maintaining his body temperature fine so he has the green light to go home. Yes, he still has OI and always will but he's stable enough to come home to us.

Thomas will be coming home later this week on oxygen and a feeding tube. Shane and I will be trained on how to manage those, his pain, and his hernias. Thomas can't have any surgeries until he's older so for now it's making sure Thomas heals, gets stronger, and that we prevent any new fractures as best we can.

Later this week we will get an answer to the big question- if Thomas has Type II OI (which is lethal). If he does, Thomas is a really rare case because most babies die within 48 hours with that type. He likely wouldn't live past his 1st birthday. Thomas shows a lot of characteristics of Type II and Type III so we're hoping that he has Type III since that one is survivable.

Our little boy did get moved to a regular hospital room though where he just has one other baby neighbor. We have a lot more room, privacy, a crib, soothing music, toys to look at, and a more calming environment. We are so grateful to the NICU for helping our boy survive this long and for the support they gave us, but we are GLAD we are outta there!

Today was a special Sunday for our family- Taylor started Sunbeams and today was the last Sunday that we had to go visit Thomas as an inpatient. :) So many miracles have taken place in the last few weeks that I can't even count... We know Heavenly Father is aware of our family and watching over Thomas no matter what happens. Thomas is such a strong little boy and I will forever be grateful for this time with him.

Tools For Peace

Tools For Peace

One of the goals that I started working on at the end of last year was going through and reading all of the conference talks from the last General Conference. I remember while I watched them last October feeling that many of them seemed to fit so perfectly to what was going on in my life at the time. Many of them seemed to be answering questions or prayers that I had.

I'm not one for waking up extra early to get my reading done, but this girl definitely appreciates a good, HOT bath! Starting in December, whenever I took a bath to relax I would pull out the Ensign and read a talk from October's General Conference. Well, I'm almost done and have loved this goal! Today I read "Make the Exercise of Faith Your First Priority".

As I was reading it I felt a confirmation that this goal was not only a right choice for me but that this talk was testifying to me why I have made some of the New Years goals I have.

Elder Scott states: "Our Father in Heaven has given us tools to help us come unto Christ and exercise faith in His Atonement. When these tools become fundamental habits, they provide the easiest way to find peace in the challenges of mortality."

1. Prayer is the first tool of peace. It is a powerful blessing and protection to have daily personal prayer and daily family prayer. He reminds us that prayer can shine an eternal light on our daily struggles and that it can provide an amor for our children. The statement about prayer that stood out the most for me was when he said "Family prayer should be a non negotiable priority in your daily life." He used the term non negotiable. That gives me a sense of urgency and makes me realize it's great importance as one of my 2015 goals. 

2. Scripture study. Currently I've been reading the modern day scripture- the words of present day Prophets and apostles. Last summer, Taylor and I would have daily scripture reading in the morning and I loved it! She gets excited when we she sees our scriptures! Since being back at school, that habit has been lost. I love how Elder Scott explains the way Heavenly Father communicates with us. "He most often communicates back to us through His written word. To know what the voice of the Divine sounds and feels like, read His words, study the scriptures, and ponder them.⁵ Make them an integral part of everyday life. If you want your children to recognize, understand, and act on the promptings of the Spirit, you must study the scriptures with them."

I know that through scripture study I HAVE had my prayers answered or the concerns of my heart have been brought to peace. Elder Scott then goes on to say "...as you dedicate time every day, personally and with your family, to the study of God’s word, peace will prevail in your life. That peace won’t come from the outside world. It will come from within your home, from within your family, from within your own heart. " I want our home to be a refuge. A place where Shane, Taylor, myself, and anyone who steps foot in our door- can feel love and Heavenly Father's spirit. I want the activities in my home to be such that it is a place where the Spirit is always able to dwell. I know that family scripture study is one of those activities. 

3. Family Home Evening. Woop woop!!! I didn't grow up having family home evening, but I always wished we did it in my home. I learned about it at church, in seminary, and from my friends. Going to FHE at the U of U student ward was a blast and often times resulted in making new friends with great people! My first spiritual goal for 2015 is to have weekly FHE. A couple months ago I bought a book about FHE planning for dads. I bought it because it had a lot of fun, kid friendly ideas and incorporated games/snacks into the lesson! PERFECT! This month we are 2 for 2 and plan on having a successful month of FHEs. Taylor has loved watching the video clips, listening to us sing the Primary Songs or hymns, and of course loves the treats. So does Shane. 

Family Home Evening Book For Dads

"Family home evening is a precious time to bear testimony in a safe environment; to learn teaching, planning, and organizational skills; to strengthen family bonds; to develop family traditions; to talk to each other; and more important, to have a marvelous time together!"

4. Temple Attendance is the 4th tool for peace. There was a time in my life when I did not hold a temple recommend but even just sitting on the grounds meant the world to me. I would travel on trax from my little apartment up by the U down to Temple Square and just sit in the plaza staring up at the temple. I would write in my journal. Write to my friends out on missions. Read the scriptures. Say a personal prayer. The first time I went to baptisms for the dead after several years of non attendance was one of the most testimony building experiences I have ever had. I felt completely wrapped in Heavenly Father's love and vowed to always being worthy of a temple recommend. I never wanted to take it for granted again... 

Flash forward to working full time with busy schedules and with a busy toddler- I feel excited if we can make it once a month! It's something that I want to change. If I have to pay a babysitter- so be it. If I have to cancel plans for a social outing-- so be it. If I have to wake up early on a Saturday- so be it. I need to make monthly temple attendance a priority! 



"We all know there is no more peaceful place on this earth than in the temples of God....Don’t let anyone or anything prevent you from being there."

"I am not suggesting that all of life’s struggles will disappear as you do these things. We came to mortal life precisely to grow from trials and testing. Challenges help us become more like our Father in Heaven, and the Atonement of Jesus Christ makes it possible to endure those challenges.¹⁰ I testify that as we actively come unto Him, we can endure every temptation, every heartache, every challenge we face..."

This talk opened my eyes to these simple truths I have known for a long time. Relating back to my goals for 2015, I know that working on these goals will give me TOOLS FOR PEACE. 

From Fall to Falling into a New Year

From Fall to Falling into a New Year

A Faith Building Fall

It was the end of September when we found out we were expecting baby #2.... We were so excited and surprised that we joyously laughed at the little blue line! I had been into the school year a little over a month. I was teaching 6 different classes and working extra hours with DECA. My excitement about the pregnancy soon manifested itself in the form of morning sickness and shortness of breath. I was loving it  though because it meant I was getting to add another child to our forever family. 

October ended up being the craziest month I've ever had as a teacher. Between field trips, competitions, trainings, and a much needed vacation to Palmyra to visit Meg & Kent- I was hardly there. 

I loved loved LOVED Palmyra, New York. It was so wonderful to learn about the church's history there and to see the sites. My testimony was strengthened each day while we were there with Shane's parents. We did a session in the Palmyra temple which I will never forget. We walked through the Sacred Grove and stood on top of the Hill Cumorah. We drove to other significant sites and explored some of the history upstate New York has to offer. It was just beautiful with the old houses and the colored trees! I've officially decided that I want to live there- farmland, small towns, and big houses...

A week or so after this beloved trip, I had to leave to go to a training in Miami. I left early Halloween morning. My parents and Shane took Taylor out trick or treating. She was the cutest little Ute cheerleader! We skyped every night while I was gone. 

Upon returning, I had my first pregnancy appointment! Everything looked great and I was making plans for the new baby to arrive on June 7, 2015. We arranged for me to come back later that week for an ultra sound and blood work. Blood work turned out fine except that I was low in sunshine. I wasn't getting enough vitamin D. At the ultrasound, Taylor was by my side and excited to see the new baby with me. Without my midwife there because it was so late in the day, it was up to me to interpret what I was seeing. At first the tech kept changing her angles so she could get a better look. But then after awhile... I realized what was happening. She was trying to confirm that there was no baby. All we could see was the beginnings of a baby that never developed. I went home that night to Shane and cried my eyes out. I cried over not ever being able to meet or hold that baby. I cried over having to wait even longer for another child. 

Miscarriage

My body thought it was 10 weeks pregnant but the midwife later confirmed that the baby didn't make it past 6 weeks. My body wasn't doing anything about it though... it continued being pregnant. We waited a week and still nothing happened. The midwife gave me a prescription that would induce the miscarriage.

 Oh my crazy... I never want to do that again... I miscarried late Wednesday night and realized something was wrong at about 5 in the morning. I was bleeding too much. I was light headed and felt like I was constantly going to the bathroom in my pajamas. But I wasn't- it was just more blood. Shane woke Taylor up and we headed to the ER. They immediately started monitoring me and gave me an IV. They couldn't stop the bleeding and eventually sent me by ambulance up to the U of U Hospital. There, a D&C was completed. Super painful even with medication. It took several days for the pain to go away and then even another week or two to feel like pre-pregnancy self. 

I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for me and has a plan for that little baby. Whether I get to be with that spirit in this life or the next, that child is mine. I will never forget that we had a little baby on the way due June 7 and how excited Taylor was for a sibling. The miserable miscarriage actually was a distraction to the emotional pain I was feeling so I feel blessed. I resolved to move forward with hope to continue trying (with the permission from my midwife) and to look towards future healthy pregnancies. 

Holidays

We spent Thanksgiving at my parents' house in Bountiful with Grandma & Grandpa B, Aunt Natalie, and my mom & dad. Originally, my best friend Ashley was going to join us, but she ended up being able to take off work to go down and be with her family in Cedar City. It was crazy- there were two turkeys. We didn't even carve into the second one. Taylor was in heaven with pumpkin pie while she sat on old phone books because we forgot her booster seat.

Shane passed his 3rd CPA test! Wahoo!!! He only has one left to go before he's a CPA!!! We're hoping this will provide him with greater career opportunities in the future.

We went as a family to a Christmas tree lot by Shane's old work- Fairchild Semiconductors. We picked it out, carried it home, and decorate the tree and the entire house. It is always so fun even though Taylor has her own way of "decorating".

One of my favorite Christmas traditions is going to the Festival of Trees. This time we went early in the day so there was hardly no crowd and Taylor got to sit on Santa's lap! I love watching the cute little dance concerts up on the stage as well... it makes me excited to get Taylor into a dance class when she's old enough. The Festival of Trees also makes these delicious scones out of Rhodes roll dough. This year we made our own scones at home in our fryer and they were soooo gooooood! New tradition? YES!

The weekend before Christmas we celebrated Taylor turning 2! We had a Frozen Birthday party with the following menu: Costco's croissant sandwiches ("we finish each other's sandwiches"), garden salad ("Troll's Tossed Salad"), marshmallows/raisins/baby carrots/pretzel sticks ("Do you wanna build a snowman?"), and a hot chocolate bar ("I wanna stuff some chocolate in my face!").

It turned out really cute. To save money, I bought winter decor instead exclusively Frozen themed. That way I can use it through January. :) We gave Taylor a tent, tunnel, a new baby doll, and a nice Elsa dress. She also had fun with our family & friends that were able to come. Thanks for the nice gifts everyone!

For Christmas Eve, we spent the day with Krissanne's family making Christmas cookies and eating cookie dough. It was a lot of fun to see Claire and Taylor being crazy and running around together. For our new Christmas Eve tradition, I made italian food for dinner and then we hopped into our new Christmas jammies, packed some hot cocoa, and got into the car. We followed an online map of awesome Christmas lights in Riverton & Draper. So pretty... and a fun way to end the day.

Christmas morning, Taylor actually slept in which was her Christmas present to us. :) We walked down the stairs as a family and opened up our Christmas gifts. Shane- a pressure cooker (to make yummy rice and so I can start canning), Jim Gaffigan, and a RC helicopter. Me- vivofit, new makeup, and new dress. Taylor- games, a doll sized pack n play, and a train set. We skyped with the Broadbents and then played together the rest of the day.

That night we went to my parent's house for Christmas dinner and exchanging gifts. It was a nice Christmas and I am so grateful for my family, the gift of the Savior, and for my Heavenly Father.

Pregnancy

Right before Taylor's birthday I was concerned that my body hadn't gone back to it's regular scheduled programming yet so I took a pregnancy test. Actually, I took 4. They were all positive. I was surprised since we hadn't been proactive about trying to time things, but it had just happened coincidentally. Of Course we were happy, but skeptical. I think it's safe to say that all women are skeptical when they get pregnant again after a miscarriage. They just don't want to be let down. A few days after I tested positive (about 5 weeks along) I miscarried. This was different than November though. If I hadn't taken a pregnancy test, I wouldn't have thought it was anything different than a really late monthly gift. I talked to my midwives and if I miscarry a third time in a row I will need to go in for some tests. We were told though to continue to be hopeful and to start trying the next month. 

Health & Fitness

It's been no secret that I worked really hard the first half of 2014 and was able to lose 30 lbs and a couple dress sizes. I worked out regularly and had completely adjusted our menu plans. I had helped several other people work towards their health and fitness goals and started my own business as a coach for Beach Body. I maintained my progress for the summer and thought I had a game plan for the start of the school year. I was going to continue my progress and continue coaching others as well all while being a mommy and working as a full time teacher. Hmmmm... I completely overwhelmed myself and couldn't figure out how to balance everything. I stopped working out. I stopped coaching. I stopped planning healthy meals. I was in survival mode. I slowly saw the pounds creep up and the clothes getting tighter. I noticed my lack of energy and loss of strength/endurance. UGGGGHHH!!!
After the second miscarriage I told myself- Christmas Break is going to be MY time. I'm going to get this figured out. I'm going to get organized and get myself back on track. I'm going to get back to nutrition, working out, and helping others!

I have a lot that I want to accomplish in 2015 so here are my New Year's Resolutions!

1. Lose 10 lbs in January. 10 more February. 5 more in March. 5 more in April. Maintain for the rest of the year.
2. Consistently have FHE every week in January. Add reading scriptures daily in February. Add daily family prayer in March. Add daily family scripture study in April. Maintain for the rest of the year.
3. Stay under $400 for weekly expenses in January. 350 in February. 300 in March. Maintain the rest of the year.
4. Save $150 month for Disneyland.
5. Attend the temple once a month.
6. Get pregnant!!!

Day 30- Positive changes, positive results!

I started this summer with many goals to work on different things in my life- balance, health, family, faith, etc. Starting the second week of September, I can definitely say that I've made positive changes and seen positive results!

My summer started off with becoming a Beach Body coach. Through coaching, I've expanded friendships, continued my goal of working towards health and fitness, helped others get closer to their goals, and worked on myself! One of my favorite things that Beach Body encourages is personal development. Some of my favorite reads have been "The Go Giver", "How to Win Friends & Influence People" and "PUSH". Currently, I'm on day 5 of PUSH and have already implemented what I'm learning and seeing immediate results!!!

The challengers that I've had the opportunity to work with this summer have helped to keep me motivated and focused. All this fitness stuff isn't just something I'm trying out- I'm committed and in love. I'm not perfect but I'm not turning back. It's been awesome to see challengers go down this same path! And seeing them make progress is seriously inspiring.

Taylor and I spent the summer doing "preschool", playing and exploring, reading scriptures, making friends, and making healthier meals. She also practiced "Down Dog", "PiYo Flip", and squats with her mama. Her vocabulary exploded and her favorite three word sentence is- I did it!!! She's become obsessed with Frozen... and asks for me to sing it to her every time we're in the car. The soundtrack is in Shane's car so I'm thinking we might need to get another copy...

Macaroni hats

Arts and Crafts

Shane started a new job and a new calling at church. It's been wonderful to see him home early on Fridays and to see him exercise his priesthood at a greater capacity in our awesome ward. We've loved spending time with Taylor in the evenings and cleaning the house together on weekends. He is such a fun dad and we have each other's back when it comes to discipline.

Shane's plane lasted less than 2 minutes in the air before it crashed...

My testimony has grown from more consistent prayer, scripture reading, and teaching the gospel to Taylor. My life is more organized and focussed on what is really important to me- family, faith, fitness, and friends. I can actually wake up early and work out before work. Reaching out and serving is more fun than sitting at home doing nothing.

For any of the changes that I've made- I know that it all comes back to how I spend my time. When I focus on how I spend my time I see positive results in the areas of my life that are most important. Going back to school shook things up a bit, but with some motivation and guidance I'm getting back on track and KNOW that positive results will continue to happen!!!

Day 22 & 23- Appreciation in small things and hurtful moments

Day 22- Appreciating the Small Things

Taylor accidentally erased this even as I was typing. The other day I was on a walk with her over to the Oquirrh Temple and was thinking about how incredibly blessed I am to be the mother to this precious daughter of God. I appreciate her sweet spirit so much and the happiness she has brought to our little family. This little one year old has taught me a lot about giving, patience, forgiveness, love, and fun.

• Whenever I tell her let's go for a walk she'll run and find my sandals and try to help me put them on. 
• While cleaning the house Taylor will clean and "wipe" things down with us. She also loves to vacuum and sweep. 
• She will say she's sorry by nuzzling her head in our chest and giving a warm smile. 
• When Shane comes home she lights up like a Christmas tree and that look is only reserved for him. 

Shane and Taylor walking to swim lessons! 

• Even if we accidentally bonk her (she is at just the right height to get bonked often) she will show forgiveness by hugging us after we've said we're sorry. 
• She will run up to us randomly to hug us and lay her head on us. Also if she catches our glance while she is playing she will pull a funny face to make us laugh. 
• When she sees a baby she will say hi and try her best to be "soft". 
• MY FAVORITE!!! Whether it's an animal or a bug, Taylor shows love and appreciation to all of God's little creatures. She will talk to them and watch them with the most loving care a one year old could muster. Taylor will get excited over an ant walking by her toes and get the most joyful and curious look on her face!

Taylor is trying to pick up a bug that looked injured...

Day 23- Finding Appreciation in a Hurtful Moment

Taylor and I went to the library to return our books and she kept running around. I think she really likes the other kids, the child sized furniture, and all the books to choose from. While we were waiting to check out our books, one of the items dropped from my hands. I had a squirmy Taylor in one arm and a pile of children's books in the other. The mother in front of me said "Oh let me get that for you" with a kind smile on her face. She bent down to pick up the item and said "It's hard enough to have a one year old, but to have a one year old and to be pregnant is REALLY hard." She gave me sympathetic eyes while she put the item in my hand. I said "Thank you so much" without pausing or showing the hurt that her comment had made. However, I couldn't stop thinking about ir while we checked out our books... while we walked to the car... while I drove home... and while I tried to enjoy the evening with my family.

I couldn't stop thinking about it because I KNOW that at my heaviest weight after having Taylor I still looked like I was pregnant. I didn't just look like I was barely showing- I looked like I was 6 months along. For any woman, it's hard to be overweight but it aches to be so overweight that people mistake you for carrying another life in your belly. I had been working so hard! I had gained close to 50 pounds with Taylor and have lost all of it. What is left is a work in progress...  I thought my body was showing progress as well so this made me take a step back and look at what had just happened. 

Another woman with sincere intentions was trying to help me out because she thought I was pregnant and struggling with my one year old in a library. That was very kind of her. On the other hand, she didn't know that I have lost 30 lbs, bra sizes, pant and shirt sizes, and inches in the last couple of months. She didn't know that I used to have a hard time going to church because I felt that no matter what I wore I looked frumpy. She didn't know that I've struggled with my weight for the past 7 years of my life and am finally doing something about. She didn't know that I'm so happy about working out and eating healthier that I'm a coach now. 

But she didn't need to know all of that. She just needed to have me say thank you and show appreciation for her simple gesture of kindness. 

It made me think though about my latest plateau. I've been stuck at the same spot for about a month. Why have I not continued to make progress? I am not where I want to be even though I'm happy at how far I've come. I'm not happy staying in the same place and want to continue making progress. I'm thinking that maybe the efforts I've been making were enough to get me this far but not enough to take me farther...

I'm wanting to go farther so I need to push my efforts farther. I need to keep challenging myself. So I'm registering for a 10k in July and going back to tracking my food in My Fitness Pal. I'm going to be more diligent about my blog as well. :) Change makes change!

Day 21- "Cafe Rio, we're breaking up!"

.... As Taylor Swift says: "It's Over. It's SO OVER"

Like I said in an earlier post, Shane and I don't eat out as much anymore. It just doesn't taste as good anymore and I feel crummy afterwards.

Let me preface this with the fact that Cafe Rio was my favorite go to fast food. I know a lot of people don't consider it fast food, but I do. I mostly would get it as carry out. I started my love of Cafe Rio when I was 19 and living up by the University of Utah. It became a special place for my roommates and I. Even after graduation, we would meet up there to chat, laugh, and eat over glorious sweet barbacoa pork burritos and salads.

I was about three months into Beach Body when I decided to treat all of my DECA students to Cafe Rio while we were competing at our State Competition. I ordered my usual. It wasn't as good as I used to think it was. Several days later my body decided to go through an intense cleanse. I was sick for 48 hours straight. No breaks. Nothing stayed in. It was miserable. Our downstairs bathroom became a hazard zone.

Right before we went to Moab last weekend, we ordered Cafe Rio so we didn't have the dirty dishes to deal and could just focus on packing up the car. I ordered my usual. Not impressed anymore at all. I did feel noticeably uncomfortable afterwards. Several days later..... intense cleanse- The SEQUEL! This time it only lasted one day, but it ruined my Memorial Day. Shane and I had plans to get all sorts of stuff done and to do some fun things with Taylor!

That evening I was feeling well enough to go celebrate my good friend and old roommate (Catherine) graduating from Med School.

While we were all together we were reflecting on our love and history with Cafe Rio. I shared with them the recent shortcomings of Cafe Rio that I had experienced. My friend shared with a story as well: Her last trip to Cafe Rio ended up with her finding a moth in her salad and Cafe Rio accusing her of putting it there! They then tried to make up for it by offering her a free meal.... uh... no thank you!

So it's official- IT'S OVER. No more Cafe Rio for me. No more "extra meat"! No more of their salsa fresca or creamy house dressing. I'm done and I'm ok with it.

I can do better. My body deserves better. :)

Visiting Teaching is Inspired

My good friend Catherine also happened to be my first visiting teacher when I moved out on my own. She actually came to my house to visit teach my roommate who happened to  not be there at the time. I invited her and her partner in and they stayed to share and listen. I was having such a bad day and going through some really rough times. She was trying to care and comfort me and barely knew me! 

When I moved back to Bountiful to go to Weber, my visiting teaching companion and I had a really good system. Because we were all single, we would trade off hosting dinners each month with the girls we visit taught. I loved it. They almost became like a second family since we were all on our own. It was nice to have that sisterhood and support. 

After Shane and I got married, we moved into his parents house while they served a mission in California. I was blessed to have Lisa and her daughter in law April as my visiting teachers the entire time I lived there. They were so great about visiting and checking in with me often. They became good friends of mine and are such wonderful examples of selfless and loving women. 

Here in our new home, my first visiting teachers came soon after we moved in. They immediately befriended me and helped me to make friends in our new neighborhood. They introduced me to Zumba and continue to lift my spirit with their friendship and example! 

I love visiting teaching and know that it is an inspired program for Heavenly Father's daughters. It allows us to reach out of our comfort zones to look after and friend one another. It encourages us to serve and to let others serve us and our families. Visiting Teaching helps me to share my testimony and brings myself and the sisters I have the opportunity to serve closer to Christ. 

Day 12- Beating Plateaus!

Day 12- Beating Plateaus!

Well, I think I went an entire week without posting... I'm not going to go back and try to make up what I missed... It was a good week though!

Yesterday I beat my plateau! I was stuck at 190 since mid march. It was my 25lb point which was a huge deal for me! I kept hovering in the low 190s and couldn't get past it. Reminding myself that it would eventually past if I put in the work, I saw my results yesterday. I weighed 189.5! Yes, a half pound down and I was celebrating! It wasn't about the number, but about the perseverance to keep going and to not give up. Today, I weighed in at 187.5! That's a 12.7% loss from my starting weight.

I'm continuing to get better at Turbo Fire and Taylor sometimes will clap and cheer me on or even start trying to do squats with me!

Seeing those small triumphs gave me a second wind of motivation, a much needed pay off, and confidence in the new habits I've formed. By the way, I LOVE eating grape tomatoes with my lunch!

I've decided that I'll finally post my before and "during" pictures this week. There will never be an "after" picture because I'll never be finished. This isn't something I'm doing until I reach my goals and then will stop and go back to the way it was before.

Weight loss aside, I have loved some of the things that I've done to help bring the Spirit into our home. It really does make a difference. So besides me reading to her, Taylor also has a love for me singing to her. She will just rest quietly in my lap while I sing to her. I don't get it- I sound like a dying country singer. Yeah, dying... in the process of dying. It's pretty bad, but she doesn't seem to mind. Maybe it's all those hours she sat in my belly while she listened to me teach at school. When she was little I used to make up songs or raps even about random Taylorisms. Our special song that always soothed her was "You are my Sunshine".

Lately, I've been singing hymns or Primary songs to her. I think she recognizes some from the ones she hears at church on Sundays- especially the Sunbeam song!

I love that the Spirit can still be felt when we're in the car together and I'm singing the Army of Helaman. I hope she feels something too. :)

Day 13- I Hope They Call Me On A Mission

Today at church we had the privilege of hearing from the missionaries during Sacrament Meeting. I loved their talks, passionate and encouraging testimonies, and invitation for us to rejoice in the Gospel! Shane and I have talked about it before, and we'd like to serve a mission when we're retired. I wanted to serve a mission actually before I met Shane and think I would love it. 

This weekend we had Shane's best friends and their wives come over for a BBQ. I did my best to work out before and ate a lunch to accommodate the extra calories for the festivities. My bun method is still my best friend at BBQs. I could even just use a half of bun and be fine. We didn't serve any soda and had our friends bring fruits and a garden salad. I did overeat on my favorite chips Ruffles Cheddar & Sour Cream and apple pie. 

But this morning, after breakfast, I was able to recruit our friends to do Turbo Fire with me! It was so much fun to work out with friends! We killed it! Their little boy even tried some of the moves with us. 

Day 14- Getting Prepared for Atlanta

This Friday I leave for a 6 day trip with some of my awesome students for DECA ICDC in Atlanta Georgia. I've made the decision that I will be taking my Magic Bullet with me to make Shakeology, KIND granola bars, grape tomatoes, mandarin oranges, and Turbo Fire to stay on track. I am excited because DECA is hosting a 5k while we are there and I'm going to register! I haven't done a 5K since before Taylor was born! I'm getting out of my comfort zone! With change, comes change!

Taylor is getting better at talking and is getting better at exercising her independence. Lately, she's been wanting to play in the trash can, turning off Shane's computer, or not following directions when we ask her to come to us. We just started doing time outs.... ahhhhh! Sometimes she screams and cries and other times she think it's funny to see if she can run away from  time out and out smart us. She is a clever little girl and really has a sweet heart, but she is definitely trying to see where her boundaries are. It's such a new learning experience for us- entering into discipline and rules. I'm really wanting discipline with love and guidance to show her how to behave and how to kind. We have no idea what we're doing though, but at least Shane and I are both on the same page and support each other when the other is having to handle a situation with Miss T. 

I'm going to miss them both so much! Last time I had a work trip, I came home after 3 days and cried when I held Taylor in my arms. 

I also discovered a new blog today that has tons of healthy, inexpensive, meal ideas! She lives in my neighborhood and really has put in a lot of work to her meal planning! I want to go to one of her classes I think. 

Days 6, 7, 8

Day 6- Girls Night!

I did my Turbo Fire workout right when I got home from work. Shane watched Taylor while I went with my best friend to meet up with our old friends that we lived with in college. We went to my favorite place- "Red Iguana" I ordered the same thing that I order every time. I know that it is a lot of calories but it's worth it! That's how I look at food now... some food definitely is not worth it. We had a lot of fun catching up and laughing!

 Day 7-  I love Saturdays!

We started our day right! Playing with Taylor, Shakeology, and working out to Turbo Fire! I made a budget and health friendly grocery list and then headed off to Costco with Taylor. I love Costco! We stocked up on canned fruit for our food storage, items for freezer meals, and lots of fruits and vegetables for the week! That evening, Taylor took a long drive up to Evanston WY to join my brother-in-law and his family for a BBQ. Shane stayed home to study for his CPA. He's working towards taking his first test later this May. It's a lot of work so we've been trying to make time for him to study.

Taylor and I loved seeing her cousins and spending time with their family. When it comes to cheeseburgers, I've learned to have just have one bun. I use the  same bun for one cheeseburger and one hot dog. Salad on the side, yes please! Water to drink, yes please! It was delicious and fun! My sister-in-law and I talked about making freezer jam sometime this summer! We both haven't done it before so I'm excited! In the fall, I want to learn how to make grape juice with my grandma.

Day 8- Sunday is a Special Day!

I've decided that I love working out in the morning and I end up being in a better mood the rest of the day. I'm wondering if I'll be able to wake up early enough to work out in the morning before Taylor wakes up...

I love going to church and feeling the Spirit. I love being able to hear the testimonies of others and to partake of the sacrament. Taylor is starting to run away now at church so that's a new adventure for us.  It's hard too because we have 1pm church and so we're there during the time that Taylor would take her afternoon nap.

I made a delicious dinner for tonight! It's a recipe from "Our Best Bites". I've made their Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas before, but tonight's was definitely my best version of it! Yes, I love mexican food and anything spicy. I know Taylor is my daughter because she ate half of one the spicy enchiladas! She's only one! She kept saying "more! more! more!".

Day 5- I figured it out!!!

I figured it out!!!! Today while I was at work I decided that I'd work out right when I got home. It worked! I worked out while Taylor played in her high chair. Hit 25 is my favorite! Then Taylor and I went to a fundraiser at the Which Wich sandwich shop in Midvale to support Hillcrest DECA. A lot of my students were there! They are so amazing! I'm so lucky to know and them and to get to work with them! I met with the owner and thanked him for working with us. Taylor was practicing saying "por favor" in the car on the way home.

After we ate our delicious sandwiches I took Taylor upstairs for a bath and bed time. She still tasted like pb&j when I kissed her goodnight. I realized though that tonight I wasn't tired. I still had energy to play, clean, or do anything my heart desired ( or that hanging out in my pajamas would allow).

I'm so happy that I figured out a better way to schedule my day though! Work, read scriptures at lunch, work, pick up Taylor, work out while Taylor eats a snack and plays, dinner, play, family prayer, Taylor's bed time, time with Shane and blog. So maybe my sink is full of dishes, but I'm happy and my family is happy!

Today when I prayed with Taylor I can honestly say that I know my prayers are being heard. I know that I feel closer to my Heavenly Father and that I feel humbled when I recognize all that He has done for me. I am so grateful for the Holy Ghost and know that when I listen and follow the Holy Ghost, I am able to recognize His voice more easily and more frequently in my day to day life.

Day 4- Listening to my body

I mentioned this before, but I AM SO TIRED!!! I don't know if I need to go to bed earlier or actually wear my contacts like I'm supposed to but I feel like I'm dragging. My eyes are tired and body is tired. The last couple of nights I have been so tired and it's only 8pm. Tonight, I fell asleep on the couch after I put Taylor to bed. Then I woke up at 8:15 and tried to do Fire 45 with what little energy I had. I Probably did about 10 minutes of it yawning the whole way through and decided- Hey! My body is trying to tell me I need to go to sleep.

Yes, I'm getting close to breaking my plateau and I want to work out regularly. But today my body is telling me something. I need to be going to bed earlier in order for my desired scheduled to be successful. In order for me to spend time with Taylor after work instead of working out, then doing dinner, and then playing with her/Shane and getting chores done... and waiting to work out until after she's gone to bed- I have to go to  bed earlier so I'm not wiped out by 8pm like I'm 80 years old. Even though I know an 80 year old wouldn't be able to keep up with Taylor, my point is made.

I am loving reading the Bible. Right now, I'm learning about Sarah. She had such an interesting life. I'm excited to learn more about the women in the Bible and the role they played in the life of the prophets. Speaking of women in the scriptures, when I was in Junior High I had really low self esteem. Well, not just in Junior High, but that was when I really didn't know my worth to Heavenly Father. My friend Shanda told me once that she wouldn't believe any of the bad things that I would say about myself. She said if I could find it in the Bible she'd believe me. Coming from a family who didn't read scriptures, I was confused. She then opened up the Bible to Genesis 29:17 about Rachel being beautiful and well favored. I'll never forget her showing me that. Later on in college, our Relief Society president introduced me to Proverbs chapter 3 about a righteous and virtuous woman being having far more worth than rubies.

I want Taylor to know her worth. I want her to know that she is a daughter of God.

30 Days of FAITH & FITNESS

Thirty Days... Strengthening my FAITH & my FITNESS

Last night, I went to bed wondering why I always come up with goals and to do lists and always say to myself "I need to wait until X to start". Like when I decided to finally do the work to get healthy, I told myself to wait until the new year. But, even though my Beach Body Challenge didn't start until January 20th, I started working out every day. I just spontaneously started and kept going. I challenged myself to see how far I could go and what kind of results I could get in a set time frame. (With Turbo Fire it's 90 days) I recently bought new pants for work by the way. I'm down from a size 18 to a size 12!!!

So last night, I spontaneously told myself to set a challenge to not only increase my faith but my fitness as well. All the time you read or hear about how writing down your goals, what you eat, etc, helps you to be more accountable. I also know that sharing your testimony strengthens it. Whether it's writing something down or saying it out loud, you become more committed. Invested. It becomes more than a dream or a goal. It becomes an action. 

I WANT to have a stronger spirit in my home. I WANT my husband and I to look at and treat one another with Christlike love. I WANT to have daily personal and family prayer (which I currently don't do). I WANT to continue to pray with my daughter and for her to recognize Jesus Christ. I WANT to follow the commandments and follow the the guidance of the prophets and apostles. I WANT to attend the temple weekly. I WANT to read my scriptures daily. I WANT to read scriptures with my husband and daughter. I WANT those that are around me to know Heavenly Father's love. 

I WANT to end my plateau and get below 190 lbs. I WANT to stick to the Turbo Fire schedule. I WANT to track my calories and exercise. I WANT to make healthier meals for my family that are also budget friendly. I WANT to be able to run 2 miles without stopping. 

My goals and dreams for my faith and fitness are written out and said out loud. I'm committed. I'm invested. I'm taking action. 

This morning, I woke up to my cute toddler and played with her as usual. This time though, I did something different. I pulled out the iPad and showed her the LDS.org video "I am a Child of God". We watched it three times. She loved it! I then, opened up my scriptures and read a chapter with her. I told her we were going to say a prayer together before we started our day. She folded her little arms and cuddled on my lap while I said a prayer. I cannot recall the last time I said a morning prayer... I then proceeded to give her breakfast and I worked out. 

Why have I not been doing this every day? I don't know if I have an answer or if I do and I just don't want to admit the answer. It doesn't matter though. Just like on making the spontaneous change to just start a new habit and commit to working out, I'm making a change. Change will make change. I had a long list of wants written down. If I want those things to change, I have to change what I'm doing. 

For 30 days, I will be writing down my testimony and progress towards these changes. Every day. Thirty days. I have to jump in. No saying that I have to wait for spring break or next month. It's now. It's today. 

I love General Conference. I love hearing messages from my Heavenly Father. I know that when I pray with my daughter that she feels the spirit. I know that my family is sealed forever because of the priesthood we have here on earth and the covenants that we were able to make in God's Holy Temple. I know the scriptures are true. I know that when I read them this morning my testimony was strengthened and my mind was enlightened. I know that the prophet and apostles are called of God and are his messengers here on earth. Their messages today were inspired and their guidance will lead me back to the arms of my Father in Heaven. I know that I am not alone. The Savior knows me and my family. He knows my concerns and my heart. I am so grateful for this testimony.  

Feeling Accomplished Today

First, in regards to weight loss I'm now down to 190!!! I've lost 25 lbs since the beginning of January. I love my Beach Body Challenge, Turbo Fire, and Shakeology! I did go through a couple of weeks where I lost my groove. Throwing up and having diarrhea at the same time will definitely take away your desire to jump around and sweat. But I didn't realize how even just 3 days of not working out will throw off my motivation and good habits. 

I'm back on track now and have plateaued at 190. I'm recommitting to track my calories on My Fitness Pal and am back into my regular schedule of Turbo Fire! With change... comes change!

Right after I woke up and played with my daughter this morning, I did my HIT 20 workout from Turbo Fire. It felt wonderful to start my day this way! 

Today was the first of the two day LDS General Conference. I love being able to listen to the prophet and apostles of the church. Last night Shane and I went to the Jordan Temple to better prepare spiritually for Conference weekend. It was our first time going since we've moved to our new house. We don't have any family near by so we had some good friends watch Taylor. I want to go at least monthly. When I am in the temple I feel so close to my Savior and my Heavenly Father. I am reminded of who I am and the woman that I can become. Going to the temple with my husband also sparks feelings that I felt when we were married and promised a forever together. 

During the first session of General Conference, I had to attend an ultrasound appointment. No, I'm not pregnant. Before I had Taylor, I used the Nuva Ring for birth control and loved it. I was like clock work and that was really helpful when we started to try to get pregnant. We're not planning to grow our family until later this fall, but what I'm currently using for birth control has been causing problems since day one. About 6 weeks after I had Taylor, I had my doctor insert the Mirena IUD after I heard a lot of benefits from research and friends. While it was being implanted, I was seeing spots and was lightheaded. It almost hurt worse than giving birth. We continued on with placing the IUD. No follow up appointments were made. Over the last year I've noticed discomfort and bleeding at random times. Knowing this wasn't normal, I asked a midwife about it and she ordered me an ultrasound so we could see what was going on. Sure enough at today's appointment, the ultrasound tech clarified that there was something wrong and that my midwife would be in touch with me at the beginning of the week. I don't know how bad, but I do appreciate the ultrasound tech being up front with me. I'm not scared, but know that it's not time yet for us to have another baby. Once we know I'm safe and it's taken out, we'll go back to the Nuva Ring until we feel ready!

On my way back home, I was able to listen to the last of the morning session that I missed. It was so nice and calming. Once I got home, I was happily surprised to find my husband busy cleaning the house while our daughter was down for a nap. We weren't able to spend that much together though since I had to leave soon after to go meet my mom, sister, and grandma for lunch. I hate a small side salad and half of steak sandwich! Go me! I headed back home in time for the afternoon sessions. 

I LOVED the afternoon session of General Conference. Here are some thoughts that I took away from it:

• Linda Reeves- commitment between spouses, spouse should always come first, support your spouses, don't suffer alone if your spouse is struggling with pornography, daily scripture study & prayer are more important than cleaning, be faithful & obedient in inviting the Spirit into our home, protection through temple attendance
• Neil Andersen- it will not be calm leading up to the Second Coming, challenges strengthen us, Helaman 5:12, Christ is my rock and safety, be in the world- not of the world. 
• Russell M. Nelson- Where is my faith? Faith is always safe in God. Look unto Him in every though. Doubt not. Fear not. Am I tied to God or man? All truth is a part of God. Read scriptures will help us make daily decisions. Liken the scriptures unto us. Popular opinion doesn't justify wrong. Have the courage to not compromise what you know to be right. Proclaim your faith. Let your faith show. 
• Richard G Scott- His wife's convictions and faith made all the difference in their life. Love people so they can know God's love. Focus life on Basic parts of the plan of salvation (conversion & strengthening families). Keep your sharing of the Gospel simple. The atonement makes it possible for us to become more like our Heavenly Father & to be with our families forever. We best serve God by being a righteous influence to others. 
• Robert D Hales- The greatest lesson Jesus taught was obedience. We have a sacred obligation to uphold our covenants and to obey God's laws. Obedience brings blessings. Obedience is taught by example. 
• W. Craig Zwick- Only good communication, no corrupt communication. Love, kindness, and civility. A soft answer. Own the truth. Address loved one's fears. Include empathy first. What is the other person thinking? Understand and listen to someone else's perspective. Administer grace. 

After General Conference today, I planned to do two things through my weekly grocery trip. I was going to SAVE MONEY and work on my EMERGENCY FOOD STORAGE. I made a grocery list like always that included 2 new recipes that I'm going to try this week. I wanted to stay focused on healthy meal choices as well. I ended up buying about $30 worth of food storage! I saved some money by buying my needed items on sale or store brands (usually don't buy store brand). 

Besides, grocery shopping I went to a book store and bought to pictures of Jesus Christ. One picture is to go down in our family room, by our computer. It's a painting of Jesus Christ holding a lamb. The other painting is for Taylor. It will go up in the hall leading to her room. It is a painting of Jesus Christ with a little girl holding an oil lamp. I love it and the feelings that it evokes. I also bought Taylor a little board book. 

After putting away groceries and welcoming my sweet husband home from his evening Priesthood Session, I am so happy today. I feel accomplished. I feel that today was a good day. I worked on goals that I've set for myself. I started the day with playing with my daughter and working out. I ended the day with pondering on the inspired messages from General Conference, chores done, an updated food storage, and an invitation to remember the Savior in our home.